I am the biggest I have ever been without being pregnant. I weighed 5 pounds heavier than the day I had Andrew this morning. It has everything to do with my eating because I consistently go to the gym 3-5 days a week and I don't just Hum and Haw through my workouts, I make them count, I sweat. I know a lot of people make the excuse that buying healthy food is too expensive, it is. But when I buy it I don't eat it and it goes to waste. Its not that I don't like healthy things, its that I don't want to eat the same things all the time and I'm not sure how to prepare some things and make them so my family will eat them too. William is also scaring me, he is pretty heavy, he needs to be more active, I need to monitor his food better, we also need to set limits and stand by those limits, not only with food but with iPod, Wii, computer, tv etc.... I read Courtney Cozier from Biggest Loser season 11's blog today. She lost 100 pounds in 9 months before ever going on the show, she was inspirational on the show. I was in tears. Yes losing weight takes steps, but gaining weight does to, and "I'll start tomorrow" or "I'll stop _____ tomorrow" never comes and suddenly you step on the scale and look in the mirror and have no idea how you let yourself become so out of control.
I've often found myself being extremely jealous of naturally thin women, and lately naturally thin and beautiful women have been the source of negativity in my head. And I find reasons to hate them, this is hurting no one but me. Maybe I need to take a break from the internet, Facebook and blogging. And just focus on myself and figure out how to take those steps to be better and to do better, and LOVE me right now, not me that I imagine exist inside me, but the Tiffany I see in the mirror.
If anyone would like to sponsor me on this journey please email me. I could use the help.
6 comments:
I've been doing the new Weight Watchers program, and so far, have been fairly happy. Steady and slow, but losing weight, none the less. I bought an app, that isn't the official program, but it was only $4 and it does the same thing to help me track food.
aw, i'm sorry! i'm sure a lot of people are in your boat!!! i have been having a very hard time losing this baby weight - but i say that, admitting i haven't done too much to get rid of it. it's just not fair that it won't come off just because i want it to!! (i'm in denial, obviously.)
i think staying off of the internet / blogs / etc is a really good idea. there is so much out there that isn't even real. i have been using the calorie counter (FREE!) - caloriecount.about.com - and it's *kind of* helping. can you do something with your kids so everyone is involved? maybe go play softball at the park? throw a frisbee? man, we're teaching them habits now they'll have the rest of their lives! Oh. The. Pressure! anyway, hang in there. i know you can do it! you just have to try, try, and keep trying!!!
ps - as far as the wii and video games and all that go - i say limit, limit, limit them - maybe an hour / day! you're the mom - you make the rules!! they can color, paint (if boys like to do all that, i have no idea), play with matchbox cars in the dirt (i did that, i LOVED it) - the possibilities are endless, aren't they? i cannot believe the kids that mike served with as the young mens presidency - very little of them have any interest in any sports at all. SO SAD. (to me.)
Awww, Tiff, I can so relate! But remember that you are amazing! You are talented and wonderful. So try to remember that stuff about yourself. The outside only matters if it matters to you. You are beautiful.
♥ you!
I know how you feel Tiff...I think a lot of time when the girls are meeting for lunch or something..I pray that something will come up and prevent me from going. I dont want to be the largest girl at the table. I have very low self esteem. Im trying my hardest to change that...I dont want my daughter to follow my footsteps. I sometimes feel like I dont have the support that I need. I wish you lived closer. We could work out or go walking together. I am here is you ever want to vent...cause girl I know and understand what you are feeling and talking about. Love you!
I feel like a broken record when it comes to my weight. I can't wait for Fall so that I can hide it all with big sweaters again! LOL.
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