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Saturday, December 13, 2008

Mixed emotions and Frustration beyond belief...

I had my doctor's appointment yesterday, I was relieved by what he said but also extremely frustrated by it too..... My body is broken... There are 4 possibilities.....

1. My body was also producing progesterone while I was taking it to make me start my cycle, and my levels are too high and as soon as they come down, I will start my cycle on my own.....this is the one we are hoping for, although I will have to be on the strongest birth control, which can cause weight gain so I will HAVE to restrict my diet...

2. I'm pregnant, which I would NEVER be upset over having another child, as I explained before the pregnancy would scare me to death and it would be horrible timing, but hey if that is what the Lord wants for us right now, bring it on...

3. The combination of my IUD, Poly Cystic, and Endometriosis, my body has gotten rid of all the estrogen in my uterus causing it to collapse. If this is the case my doc will go in (lapriscopically), fill my uterus with estrogen, and then start me on a stronger version of Clomed, which helps people get preggers..... But if it is collapsed and he does this procedure, fertility may not return.....

4. I may have early onset menopause.......

Options 1 and 2 are the best case scenarios, we could deal with the consequences of them, 3 and 4, I know we could handle it, but it just breaks my heart to even think about them.... That Matthew could be the last child that we as a couple get to bring into this world.... I know that we are given trials to strenghthen us and to teach us, I just feel like there has been a lot on our shoulders over the last two years, I just want to lose weight and have another child, is that so obscure and unreasonable?


9 comments:

Sell...Party Of 3 said...

Oh, those dang girly parts! Love them, because they bring us these cute kids of ours, but hate them for putting us through so much eh??

I had heard that you can't get a accidental positive pregnancy test...even according to the dr, so we all know what that means...miscarriage. =(

Krystal said...

I'm so sorry, Tiff, I hope things get better...I can't imagine what you must be going through since I've never had children, but I hope that when the time comes, all the parts work! Good luck in the coming weeks and thanks for keeping us updated.

Alice said...

Oh Tiff, I swear the things you guys have had to deal with, Heavenly Father is preparing you guys for great blessings to come! Take care, let me know if I can help in any way!

Derek-Jenny-Kaitlynd-Ethan-Dylan said...

I am so sorry that this is happening.
I am also proud of you for talking about it. I hope it helps you deal with it better.
Love ya! :)

Kristy said...

girly i know what your going through...with me having the PCOS, hypothyroid, dysplasia etc....it sucks...I always knew I only wanted 2 kids..call me selfish..but I wanted a little family. I got lucky with one boy and one girl. I was on clomid for a year with Reyna before getting preggers....which is scary cause it can cause cysts on your ovaries. With Josh they had me on different pills, with wierd schedules to take them..but it only took 3 monthes to get preggers with him. ill keep you in my prayers....love ya

Kristy said...

girly i know what your going through...with me having the PCOS, hypothyroid, dysplasia etc....it sucks...I always knew I only wanted 2 kids..call me selfish..but I wanted a little family. I got lucky with one boy and one girl. I was on clomid for a year with Reyna before getting preggers....which is scary cause it can cause cysts on your ovaries. With Josh they had me on different pills, with wierd schedules to take them..but it only took 3 monthes to get preggers with him. ill keep you in my prayers....love ya

About Us said...

I am sorry to hear about your troubles. This must be difficult on you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

heather said...

Holy crap, sorry to hear about all your stuff right now. Everything happens for a reason right? You'll make it though.

Also, you need to tell Bonnie hi for me since her blog is private.

Angie said...

I'm sorry T. I can't imagine what you must be going through. I'm here for you if you need me. Give me call and I can be there in 10 minutes. :) I'll be praying for you.